Happy New Year to all my supporters and those who have taken the time to read my inspirational blog. Yes, I’m still here, but just took a short sabbatical from writing. I’m back and am excited about all the amazing inspirational testimonies I’ve heard from many of you over the past several months.
Over the holidays and as of recent, I’ve been focusing on taking time out to reflect and to think about the past year, my goals, my family, and most importantly, the calling and vision that God has for my life. Hopefully, you’ve done the same thing or are currently planning to do it. Reflecting and seeking God about the calling He has for your life is extremely important, not just because it’s a new year, but so that you’ll be clear on your purpose in life.
I have been overwhelmed of God’s presence and how He’s been so faithful to me, even in the midst of challenges and various seasons in my life throughout 2016 that I wanted to write about it. So you may be wondering, where am I going with all this. Well, I’m glad you asked. Are you a P.P.J.? (a People Pleasing Junkie)
The one thing that has been on my heart lately and that I’ve been talking to Dad about (when I say Dad, I mean God) is being more God focused vs. pleasing man. I get tired of always worrying so much about what people think, so God has been reminding me to focus my attention more on what He thinks; not trying to seek mans approval, but being more concerned about getting God’s approval about situations in my life. Can you relate?
During my reflection time and thinking about various experiences in my own life, interactions I’ve had with people, and through my readings, I’ve experienced and learned how easy it is for us as humans to get so caught into the cares of this world and life in general, that we are determined to try to please man. Whether it be by living up to a boss’s expectations, your parents expectations, a man or woman’s expectations, or just our own high unrealistic expectations at times, it’s important that we REMEMBER that at the end of the day, God’s approval and answer is what matters most.
For those of you who have experienced trying so hard to live up to other people’s expectations and failed, being a people pleaser, or what I call a P.P.J (People Pleasing Junkie), you are not alone. For most of my life, I’ve been a hard worker, and a person who always wanted people to like me and pat me on the back for doing a good job. Just to be transparent, I am a recovering people pleasing junkie. Yes, I said it! I didn’t realize that getting man’s approval was soooooooo addicting to me until I was in my early to mid 30’s believe it or not.
Over the years, God has shown me how despite what people’s expectations are of me, whether it be in a job, business, family, relationship, marriage, school, etc., at the end of the day, my focus needs to still be on pleasing God and embracing His approval. Who cares what people think because they don’t have a heaven or hell to put you in. That’s the attitude that people, especially those who are believers need to have when it comes to dealing with people.
One of the scriptures that God has reminded me of is Romans 12:2, where it says, “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what [is] that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God”. This scripture is a reminder to us that God desires us to not be conformed to this world, but to have our mind renewed. The more we meditate and spend quality time with God and in His Word, the more our minds will be renewed and transformed, and the urge and temptation to seek man’s approval vs. God’s approval will decrease, and eventually die.
That’s what I’m excited about; Allowing God’s Word to become so much a part of my spirit that the urge and craving to please man and to win approval from people will no longer exist. If you have or are currently experiencing being a people pleasing junkie, then this is also my pray for you as well.
I’m here to tell you that you are NOT alone. There are others in the world who have also experienced this, and have been delivered from being a people pleaser. The root of worrying about what people think or wanting to please people is FEAR. I have heard it stand for FALSE EVIDENCE APPEARING REAL.
God has shown me that the reason I was trying to please man and win their approval was because of fear. The fear of man not liking me, accepting me, thinking I’m weird, not thinking I’m smart enough, cool enough, determined enough, or even good enough to get the job done in whatever capacity it was at the time. Here’s a powerful video podcast from one of my inspirational, spiritual hero’s, Terri Savelle Foy on Fear that has helped me in the area of overcoming any deep down fears. Super powerful!
You may have also experienced these fears. If so, KNOW that God loves you and desires that you be “renewed in the spirit of your mind and that you put on the new man which was created according to God, in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:23-24). Of course, this is geared to those who have accepted Christ into their lives, however, ALL are open to the invitation to accept the real Man, Jesus Christ who we ultimately need to be pleasing and seeking approval from.
If you’re reading this and are hurting, and feel as though being a people pleaser has been a major struggle for you, I can identify with you. Know that you’re not alone and that women and men all around the world, are getting delivered and set free from this people pleasing addiction everyday. THERE IS HOPE! The hope we have is Jesus! Praise God! Be encouraged my sister and brothers in Christ Jesus. I will be praying for you and cheering you on virtually. As you feel led, please share your experiences on this topic in the comments section, so others can be encouraged from your story.
Thank you so much for reading this blog and embarking upon this inspirational journey of life with me! If you were encouraged, inspired, or can identify with the message/story, please feel free to comment. I’m sure others will be encouraged by hearing YOUR story.